For they are wrathful. Despite living in a place where it is meteorologically impossible, despite temperatures reaching 90 not 2 days before, do not, do not, mention how wonderful it is to ride a bike, because the fates will call down a hail storm on your ass while you bike home from campus.
When I took off my helmet, a whole Icee full of slush poured off.
Those of you who know where I live can share in my stupification, but not my sodden blue jeans.
I need hot chocolate.