Saturday, January 06, 2007

Scientific Progress Goes 'Boink' Indeed

Oh, I almost forgot to link this. Since we were all um... excited about mannequin boobs and nipples and such, note that we aren't the only ones (link perhaps not safe for work).

winning quotes from the article:

The realistic-looking mannequins ... can have realistic silicone nipples added.
Instead of being designed for naturally big breasted women the mannequins' breasts are abnormally high up for their size suggesting they are modelled on women with implants.
Now, for me, I'm just wandering about the R&D folk who are tasked with designing the 'realistic silicone nipples.'
Late at night, sequestered in a dark mad scientist's lab deep in the Hot Topic R&D in Hoboken, they try experiment after experiment, failure upon failure, nearly giving up their noble cause - "Dammit! They still aren't realistic enough!"
Then, one night, or was it early morning? Several empty pizza boxes and three interns (of normal bust size) are sprawled around the lab having finally succumbed to exhaustion, their nipple reaction surveys scatted over the desks and floors. Suddenly, Dr. Headlamp stands up in disbelief. "Good God. It's done. They're... perfect."

And they say that the sciences are dying...

Rice Monster

IMG_0003

So there's the photo of the day over at the photo365 blog, and maybe it requires a bit of explanation. I used a little bit of Christmas money to get it and so far I'm really really happy.

One of the things I'm trying to do more is cook at home, which oddly enough seems a lot easier when I don't have to run all over campus all day long. We'll see how much I'm cooking next week when school starts up.

Anyway, back to the rice monster. It's a Zojirushi NS-ZCC10. I did a fair amount of research before choosing this one, but lemme tell you, trying to figure out which rice cooker is like asking a room full of 14 year olds if the PS3 is going to be better than the Xbox 360. It'll only end in tears, with each side retreating to prepared fortifications of bias and loathing. It looked like most of the big brands were all reliable and honestly pretty much the same. I ended up with the Zojirushi partially because I love their little elephant icon. (that's not entirely a joke)

I've only used it a couple of times so far, both with a nice jasmine rice, and each time the rice turned out wonderful - fluffy and fragrant and just perfect. So far, the rice has been a nice part of a kung pao chicken (so-so, I used a pre-made sauce. tsk tsk.), a couple iterations of fried rice (lessons learned - eggs in a carton: not bad! ginger - very strong, I really didn't need to put so much in) and as a base for a chili. So far, all very nummy. I would have taken pictures for you all, but frankly, none of them were particularly photogenic.

I'll post a little more about it once I try some more rices and get a feel for all its extra settings.

8.67mi - 1:06'01"

Friday, January 05, 2007

Shave and a Haircut - One Freak!

I guess today's picture really should have involved what happened when I went in to get my hair cut today...

So I show up at the barber shop and there looked like there were two stylist folk working there today. They were both taking care of people so I sat down and pulled out a book to read while I waited. Then a guy came out from the back area (or at least I thought he did at the time - in any case I hadn't seen him when I came in). He walked around a bit like he worked there, so I looked up and tried to make eye contact to let him know I was next in line.

Then he sat down in one of the barber chairs. and started to cuddle with a tupperware bowl full of... something.

ok.

Maybe he's on break? It was about lunchtime, so that's not unthinkable. I'll just wait until someone calls me.

One of the stylists finished, but had an appointment come in right then, so she took her over to the chair where the odd man was sitting. She said something and the man replied, "No, man. I need this chair. I need it because my family died yesterday."

ok.

There was more mumbled conversation and the man finally is moved to another barber chair, but he didn't sit down. He stood up in the middle of the barber shop and crosses himself a few times (kinda like Sammy Sosa used to - quick, kissing his fist after each time). Then he jumped on the ground and pounded his fist on the tile a few times before jumping back up and starting into a kung-fu shadow boxing routine.

He was actually kinda good.

While he was doing this he started mumbling about all sorts of people, George Bush ("that rat - he's the rat. I ain't no rat"), John Elway ("me and Elway, there's nothing you can do about that, me and Elway), Bruce Lee ("This one's for you Bruce Lee, man Bruce Lee man") among others that I couldn't quite hear.

Partway through his routine, ignoring polite requests that he "take that outside, please," He started dancing behind the mirror of one of the stylists, looking at himself and posing behind them. So, she's there cutting hair, and this guy is jumping all around right behind her - and the poor woman who just came in to get a trim.

Oh, and now he's occasionally jumping over to the walls and pounding his fists against them too.

Finally, he calmed down a bit and moseyed over to the cashier's table and started doodling on the appointment pad (he must have taken it, or maybe he didn't actually write anything, 'cause I looked afterward and could see anything interesting.)

After awhile, he left his stuff there (hoodie and one sock) and paced out into the hallway. While he was gone, the security folks came in and asked about him. They couldn't find him.

Security left, and the man strolled back in, got his stuff and left.

I got a pretty good haircut.

Photo365 Blog

The Brightest of Stars has decided to start a Photo365 blog (hers is here) and I think the idea is just so peachy, I've gone ahead and stolen it! So here's my day #1!

Anyone what to start a pool to see how long it lasts before I give up? Everyone put in a nickel and guess the date!

4.46mi - 32'46"

Slower and slower! But hey, it was really windy today. and chilly. So there :P

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Moderate Link Dump

  • Funky French Animations. Honestly, I only watched Geraldine (the man who gets turned into a woman and L'Eau de Rose about a couple breaking up on a ferris wheel. Ha-ha out loud funny. Check out the illustrations on the left too. There are a couple of nipple slips that I saw, so work surfer beware.
  • The dangers of asking why when you are 3 and your father is a prof.
  • Of course dogs talk. Some do it better than others tho.
  • Scary. 200 calories in many forms. Thank goodness they didn't include nachos or mint chocolate covered oreos.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Open Letter to Woman at the Grocery Store

Nonchalantly telling your child it's ok when they knock a few glass jars of olives onto the floor (where they shattered and spread glassy olives throughout aisle 9) isn't horrible really, but adding, "there are people here who'll clean that up" earns you scorn points!

And I thought I would wear out my scorn gland when you then proceeded to pick up a bottle of bacon bits, open it and stuff your festering gob. Yes, you actually poured bacon bits into your mouth. Well, most of them I imagine landed in your mouth. I know that a lot of them also were added to the glassy olive slurry on the floor.

I know it's not good to judge by appearances, but you seemed like a well-to-do lady, and your children looked healthy and nicely dressed. Maybe it was a bad day. I don' have kids, so I can't know the mental strain that it puts you under.

No, that's not an excuse.

Scorn.

4.32mi 31'15"

Monday, January 01, 2007

Memo Re: Wishes, Good. (On the Occasion of New Year (2007))

I'm confident that I am not the first to do so, but let me offer you a sincere and hearty dollop of Good Wishes for our upcoming new year. I herein disclose my hopes (A note must be made that the entirety of my hopes for you in the coming year are boundless and cannot be contained in simple blog form, or for that matter, within the conception of the human brain, my own included. The following is simply a very brief outline of the highlights):
  1. May you find the love of your life, whether embodied in:
    1. a new person you do not currently know but within the next twelve months is fated to cross your path,
    2. a boy/girl (and by that I mean a boy or girl of any age, not a "boy/girl" amalgamation. Unless you are into that kind of thing. Which is cool by me.) you've been darting furtive glances toward in the lunch hall or other suitable gathering arena (alternatively, giving eyes and then panicking in Dr. Scott's science exam is also acceptable),
    3. someone who you already are and have been close to
      1. If you are already convinced of your love for said person, I hope that you both mutually discover that previously you did not know love and only this year discover the true depths of your devotion and happiness together
      2. If you've been hanging out with this person but have been on the fence as to the L-word (love, not lesbians. Unless you are into that kind of thing. Which is very cool by me.), I hope that you discover within your partner a heretofore unnoticed germ of love that blossoms much like the dandelion - uncontrollable and all over your yard. Also, like dandelions, I hope that your partner turns your chin yellow when rubbed up against it, and that you try this. Often.
    4. Yourself. Included as a legal catch all for all you do not wish to find love in others in the coming year. Which is cool by me.
  2. That your friends are friendly, in all that entails
    1. If you have no friends, may you get one or some. In case you feel you don't want any, I'm sorry, I still hope you get some, because, come on.
  3. That you find success and fulfillment in your profession/studies
    1. May your theses/articles/dissertations/monographs/furious densely-printed diatribes to the editors at the New York Times/ultimatums flow bounteously from the fecund well of your mind to the page and/or word processing software of your choice, and be received with respect and success, and in the case of the ultimatums, trembling fear.
      1. I also hope that you avoid the imagery of the 'fecund well,' because it sounds kind of gross
    2. May you achieve beyond the expectations of your supervisors and yourself. Especially if your supervisors have the authority to grant juicy bonuses and/or promotions.
    3. May you find the work that you do is not a 'drag.'
      1. Unless your work involves cross-dressing. Which is cool by me. Hey, we've all been there.
      2. If you are willing and happy to trade a 'drag' job for oodles of cash/access to the corridors of power/free meals/lobbying junkets, then I wish that you work as little as possible and order the tortellini. I hear it's delicious.
    4. May you find personal growth and intellectual stimulation in your work.
    5. May the people you work with/for not be assholes.
      1. This goes double for the self-employed
    6. If you currently have no job:
      1. May you get a good one
    7. If you don't want a job:
      1. I append to my wish that you find the love of your life that said love of your life be disgustingly rich and happy to let you laze around the house all day claiming that you'll finish that novel one day, you swear.
      2. That you've got a bitchin' RV to live in next to the beach and a restaurant that throws out perfectly good half-eaten entrees. Oh, and that they give spaghetti dinners to lovable cartoon dogs.
As mentioned above, this in no ways encompasses the totality of my wishes to you, dear reader, for the upcoming year. In fact, I could probably narrow it down quite a bit. Let's try:

I hope that you will be well and not get hurt. Unless you are both into that. Which is cool by me.

8.75mi - 1:03'29"