Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Excuse Me, I'm Going to Need to See Your Fashion License

Ok, folks, now, as your TA*, I feel that I should let you in on some news you can use. I'm speaking in particular to the double-chromosomed among you. I realize that as the weather gets warmer, many of you are deciding to wear less clothing. I completely agree that this is a good idea and I support your choice as far as that goes. Now, as I am a heterosexual man, you might think that I am particularly in favor of the women among you wearing much less clothing. While I am a great admirer of the female form, there are some issues here. First, you are in a classroom situation, this might suggest a slight need for a little bit of decorum. Also, there is a difference between comfortable and cool clothing and oh, so very trashy. Finally, what the fuck? Did you really choose to wear that? With that in mind, I offer some warning signs that you may want to rethink your wardrobe:

  • The neck of your blouse/shirt/top ends at your belly button
    • even moreso if you are wearing a granny bra
    • Also, go get your bra size checked. You aren't the size you were when you were 15. Seriously, folks, that looks painful.
  • If you are wearing a micro-mini skirt, go ahead a put a sweatshirt or bag or something in your lap when you sit down, and go ahead and keep your knees together or legs crossed.
  • I don't care what fashion says, I still really really really don't want to see half-way down your crack. really. I don't.
  • Your heels are so high that you can't actually walk
    • Although I have to admit it is hilarious to see you running to classes in flip-flops.
  • Remember that when you are walking up stairs there will be people behind you that are eye-level with your butt. Perhaps the very thin white pants are not the best choice to pair with your teddy-bear undies.
    • Admittedly, they were cute.

* Note that your TA is particularly fashion-challenged, and no one who should be listened to when it comes to clothing suggestions. Go here for better fashion advice.


BrightStar said...

Too much information in this post. ack!

Overread said...

hehe - yeah, sorry about that B* :)

There's way to much information in my classes, too :P

jayfish said...

so.... you didn't like the skirts? :P

liz said...

I had a summer course teacher who wrote into the syllabus that "if you wouldn't wear it to see your grandmother, we don't want to see you in it either."

richard said...

Yeah, this sounds like my classes - not my "tech writing for engineers" classes, but some of the others!