My Precious, PhD.

It’s time to go home now, but I have to pass along a little joke that Russian Violets had up on her site because it just about made me cry. I present… Professor Gollum!

Tricksy studentses. Hates them, precious, yesss, we hates them. Studentses, grubbing for gradeses, grubbing and ssscraping and ssneaking, and their heads sso empty-- ssssso empty, gollum, gollum. No brains. No scrumptiously crunchable brainses, no precious, jusst air and dussst. Dussst!Hates them. Ssstupid sstudentses, don't even read the textbook, no preciouss. They writes, and writes, and sscrawls and scribbles-- our eyes, precious, we must ruin our poor eyeses on their scratchings-- but they don't think, do they, precious? They never thinksss. Gollum. No, no thinking for them, sstupid studentses. Too good for thinking, gollum But we'll show them, preciouss, yess.Fail them. Fail them, precious. We can bleed bright red ink all over their nassssty homeworks, yesss, precious. We can fail the studentses. Make them cry. Make them weep and wail and sssob. Yesss.Ssstudentss. Filthy, sstinking, ssstupid studentsss. We hatess them, we hates them forever!Yess, precious. Gollum, gollum.

Also, I get the best spam. Well, actually I guess everyone gets the same stuff, but I really love the poetry of some of this. Here’s one I really wanted to open. I know it’s just using all this to get past filters (it didn’t get past Gmail’s though – yea Gmail!), but what if there was content in there that matched this opening line:

X Men in 1934 You’d better not… Prom Hairstyles for teen in hazing Cheats

How could you not be intrigued? What would the X Men be like in 1934? And do you need specific hairstyles for hazing at prom? Clearly, I went to the wrong high school!