Notes From The 5th Row

• Guy reading directly from paper zombie-like makes finger quotes several words after the word he meant to finger quote
• Members of the panel look zombie-like while listening to paper. Are they listening?
  
• Dude is a good speaker, but the mic is having a tough time picking up his voice because his head is buried in his paper. Seriously, his neck is at like a 90 degree angle. That can't be comfortable
• More mic troubles. Ma'am, please be aware of your swaying. back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Leads to: quiet quiet quiet, mumble mumble LOUD LOUD LOUD mumble mumble LOUD mumble quiet quiet. What was your topic again?
  
• Macs are also not immune from the powerpoint curse. The cable will not truck any type of computer. Woe be to those who needed visual aids for this panel.
• (completely different panel) Overhead projector? Might as well bring out the campfire so we can make shadow puppets on the wall. They could have at least got one that had consistent focus. Here's a headache potion
• It's so sad to see the fleeing of audience members after the big name has finished her paper. The next presentation was a good one, too
• A monotonous tone can make even the most interesting topic duller than a pair of kindergarten scissors.

Forgotten

on this trip:

Eyeglasses
Contact case
Saline solution
Ethernet cable
Conference registration material - including my 'Hello my name is' tag

feh!

Horray!

I got to see the nieces last night, and they are truly sweet beyond understanding. There was much My Little Pony-ing and a good time was had by all. Number 1 niece is a flat out genius. She's already running a laptop like a wiz. But, oh, niece number 2 is only a year old, but is already showing an interest in books! Well, it's in tossing books from the bookshelf, true, but still!

I think I'm even becoming a little more recognizable to them too, which is amazing, considering I hardly ever get a chance to see them.

Ah, they're just beautiful. I'm sure we got them so wound up that they didn't go to sleep for hours though hehe.

Originally uploaded by Overread.

Originally uploaded by Overread.

I'm Leeeeeavin' On A Jet Plane!

I am such the jet-setter. I've got a meeting at 11, a lecture at 12:30 and a flight to catch a little after that. I'm flying off to Monster Conference which is nearby the Land of Wonderful Nieces (and Brother too!), so I get to go to there and enjoy both MonCon and family!

Oh, and despite my late email, potential advisor at Prospect #1 Uni has graciously agreed to meet with me and chat about my potential future there. Yea!

Also, and even more terrifying/thrilling:

The summer class schedules came out and I am listed as the instructor for my two summer classes. What is the world was this university thinking hiring me?! Don't they know what they're doing? Don't they know I will most likely... um... break their students?

And finally, why no, no I haven't packed yet, why do you ask?

The Emmy Goes To...

The Little Professor

She's simply much funnier than she has any right to be.

more videos

here

An American Revolution

So, it seems that Chevy thought it would be cool to allow random folks on the internet build commercials for them. Brilliant, right? Who needs all those ad execs anyway?

Hilarity ensues.

Enjoy the videos: (more here)

Originally uploaded by Overread.

Apropos of Nothing...

Note to all the ladies out there:

When the bathroom trash can has just been emptied (mind you this is a bathroom used by four people and the only option most of the time), perhaps there might be a better place to throw away your dingy thong.

It's been sitting there all alone for days now. Maybe I should give it a decent burial shroud of toilet paper so I don't have to look at it.

No Fair

I want my hour back.

"Making Eye Babies" Not Allowed

I'm not sure if everyone saw this during my down time, but it's pretty good. This whole college sounds like a fraternity prank.

Pensacola College: If Bob Jones seems a little too permissive for you. Just don't try to transfer the credits or get a job with the degree you got there.

My Own Little World

Why is it that I am so unable to be social?

Even when it is in my best interests, it’s very difficult for me. I just had a long conversation with an advisor who repeated what many other folks had told me: It would be perfectly acceptable to email potential advisors from potential PhD programs who will be at the upcoming conference and ask to meet with them.

This would be very good for me because it would give me an opportunity to meet with them and gauge personalities and see what the programs would be like and maybe get a taste of the atmosphere and all that good stuff.

So why is it so hard for me to send the emails?

Am I afraid that they’ll think I’m pushy?
Am I afraid they’ll say no?
Am I afraid they’ll say yes?
Am I generally happy thinking that if I do nothing, people will naturally feel my brilliance and rain opportunities and funding down upon my head? Well, maybe so…

So I sent the emails.

Inbox = 0

Woohoo! It can be done! For 90% of them, I could have just pasted "No." as a response and been done with it, but alas, I'm a verbose little twit.

Biking Blues

Now I'm a very pro-biking, anti driving-two-blocks-to-pick-up-a-gallon-of-milk kind of guy myself, but I'm quick to admit the troubles of biking. Number one is weather of course. I'm lucky enough to live in a land of perpetual spring and roses, but when it does get rainy, it goes all monsoon-style. It's been doing that a lot lately. I bought some nice rain gear, even a backpack rain cover, and that seems to be working well.

Yesterday however, sadness struck. I got a flat on the way home. Poop. Luckily, I wasn't in a hurry or anything and I was close to the grocery store that has a nice bike rack, so I walked my sad bike over there and locked him up. This also gave me an excuse to go in and get a 70% dark chocolate bar for the rest of the walk home. Num. Although I do wonder if the guy who saw me take all the stealable things off my bike thought I was being thiefy. And I've got the Audible.com audiobook thing going, so even though it was still about a mile or so from home, it didn't seem too bad. (I'm now listening to this book - very fun)

So today I got to hoof it back to the grocery store, get the bike, walk it over to the bike shop and get a new tube & tire put on it while I ate lunch. Yes, yes, I am able to do it myself, but I'm lazy. Like so many stores, the bike shop is dangerous. They had a very cool high candlepower headlight and a cool ergonomic seat that almost found their way into my purchase.

Anywhoo, story of little import, but just another excuse to say that I love biking instead of driving. I should also say that I don't even have a car, so it might be a case of making a virtue of necessity. The way things are panning out, I'm probably going to be going to a very different climatic world to read my PhD. I think I'll still be able to bike, but it's going to be much more challenging - fun!

The DTs

I’m not dead yet!
I’ve been on a several day bender.  I’m a wild guy, ya know.  I apologize for not at least posting a ‘gone fishing’ sign.  
I’ve been doing all sorts of wild and crazy things like getting a full night’s sleep and eating and watching movies. 
I got on the Netflix trial plan and so far it’s pretty fun.  I finally watched Good Night and Good Luck, which was quite good, but I may have over-hyped it in my mind.   I’ve also watched some good guilty-pleasure flicks like the Clone War cartoon series and Sahara.  Tonight is Breakfast at Tiffany’s – I know, I know, I’ve never seen it, ok?  The shame of it all!
Important lessons learned:
-          Eating an obscene amount of black licorice while grading monster essay exams will lead to monster intestinal distress.  I’m not sure if it was the quality of the exams or the quantity of licorice that did it though.
-          Loss of water weight from intestinal distress is a great way to lose weight.
-          I am still very subject to addiction to video games.
Digression:
My brother and I were very early adopters of computer game joy.  It all started with pong.  We actually had a pong console.  How cool is that?  The early real danger was from the Atari 2600.  Ah, Adventure, what a wonderful game.  I never did get good about catching the bombs in my water buckets though.  Later we moved in the land of C64 games.  I have wonderful memories of spending long long cold hours in the freezing room which had the computer.  We would both be wrapped in piles of blankets with a space heater at our feet.  One of us would be the designated map-maker while the other would direct the combat of our merry band of characters.  He did the best maps – we went through pads of graph paper.  Also required for our adventures were massive cups of heavily sugared tea and unending bags or tortilla chips with gallons of salsa.  It’s a pity we didn’t have Costco back then. 
In any case, my reward for hitting my weight loss goal was to buy a video game.  It’s good.  I’ve lost many hours of usefulness already.  I better bore of it before class starts up again next week or else I’m in a lot of trouble.

Imagine...

Overread...

crawling across the desert. He is bedraggled. His lips are cracked. His clothes are torn - he has tied a shirt around his head to shield himself from the merciless rays of the sun. He crests a dune and sees before him an oasis of crisp pure water. That oasis is his only chance for salvation.

It's only 9 papers away. I'm into the single digits. Finally.

By the way, I know it's all a mirage. I've still got the monster 3 hour essay exams to grade after that, but hey, the oasis is a goal to strive for, even when I know the sweet clear water will only turn to silica grit in my teeth.

Bonus cafe stories:

There's another group of graders across from me. One howler they got must have been especially good. The guy reading in burst out laughing. He tossed the paper to his friend who also started laughing - loudly. All I heard was the quote, "Monkeys all over campus!" talk about intriguing. It could be as good as Snakes on a Plane

Also, dude over there reeks of pot.

Also, dude behind me is trying to sing along with the jazz standards on Starbucks Radio. He's failing miserably.

Running Rumbling Tumbling Tummy

8.32km - 38'39"

I almost trod on a black furry caterpillar. It was most distressing.

Also: Although the skittles, they call to me, it might not be the best idea to eat a bag before going on a run.

You Can Tell I'm Grading, Can't You?

Taken from Metafilter's Ask pages

Q Why does Lenin drink peppermint tea?
A Because all proper tea is theft.

Karl Marx goes to visit his friend Friedrich Engels, they have tea and cake, and Marx excuses himself to use the bathroom. As he flushes the toilet, he hears the unmistakable sound of a string quartet. He shrugs and goes back to Engels.
Over the next few weeks, Marx continues to visit Engels and use his bathroom, and every time he flushes, there's the sound of a string quartet.
Finally he confronts Engels: "Look Friedrich, every time I flush your toilet, I hear a string quartet, what's that all about?"
"Oh that," says Engels, "That's the violins inherent in the cistern."

An angel appeared at a university faculty meeting and told the dean that in return for his exemplary behavior, the Lord would reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom or beauty. Without hesitating, the dean selected infinite wisdom. "Done," the angel said, then disappeared. The other faculty members looked at the dean, who was surrounded by a halo of light. One colleague said, "Say something wise.” The dean sighed and said, "I should have taken the money." - Playboy's Party Jokes